Friday, April 24, 2009

Blessed and grateful



I am having a day where I just feel blessed! I really have a great life! The first reason I feel blessed is thinking about all the places I have been...funny this was brought on by a Facebook application where you choose the type 5 places you have been. Mine were: Puerto Vallarata, Mexico (been here twice and the second time was probably my favorite vacation); St. Thomas and Puerto Rico- on the same trip we also went to St. Martin and St. Croix. This was a Caribbean cruise with my family. I think I saw the most beautiful water and beaches on that trip. I also had down Guatemala which wasn't a vacation but a mission trip. It is a beautiful place! The 5th location was Hawaii. I went at a time of record rainfall so I didn't enjoy it as much as the average person but it was still beautiful.





Besides thinking about all the places I have been blessed to visit...seeing God's BEAUTIFUL creation...I feel blessed by the people in my life. I love visiting with friends...I went over and saw my friend Jaime's 5th child and first son last night. It was refreshing just to be with her kids and talk with her for awhile about life. I have so many great friends!

I also am really grateful for the home God entrusted me with 3 1/2 years ago this weekend. It is AMAZING to me time and time again that he saw it fit to give me this blessing.

The weekend ahead looks really open but I am excited to do one of my favorite things (weather permitting)...garden! I took up this hobby last year and really enjoy it. It is relaxing...I love to see things grown...I have a deeper appreciation for creation...and I just really enjoy it! I might do some decorating which has been a hobby of mine for years. Time to take down all the wintery things and bring out the summer stuff. Fun!





What are you grateful for?

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Give me Jesus...

I am listening to Jeremy Camp's song "Give me Jesus". It is a refreshing song that brings perspective..."you can have all this world...give me Jesus...". I wrote a post last week that never got published. I could publish it but it seems sort of outdated. One thing I was writing about, though, was the recent loss of a student (if you live in Portland you might have heard about it on the news- rockclimbing accident...her brother-in-law died, too, and was a Gresham Police Officer. That week was really sad around here and the funeral extremely sad. But I realized for me life goes on. Her husband stopped by last week to ask a question and I was really sad for him rest of that afternoon. But I woke up the next day not thinking about it anymore. They do come to my mind often and I pray for them...but for me the sadness is mostly gone. What is my point? Well, I have realized a couple of things through this tragedy...the biggest thing is to LIVE life to the fullest. Not "eat, drink and be merry"...but living a life of purpose. A life I would be proud of when I stand before my Maker. A life that if I died a premature death others would say the nice things they said about Laura Silva. A life that leaves a legacy... I have been trying to find ways to do this...my first step is "risking" more in ministry and relationships. I like to play it safe most of them...because of past hurt and because I am not much of a risk taker... I want to spend more time with my Lord. I have been actively trying to do that...acknowledging His presence throughout my day...asking Him to be glorified through me today...

I also realized that for me the sadness might be gone...but for their families and close friends it will linger for a long time...maybe forever. It makes me realize how each of us have some level of pain in our lives...some more than others...I don't understand fully why some of us are given more than our share (like the Silva family) but I do know that pain can lead us several ways...to bitterness OR closer to the Father. Longing for Heaven...to be free of pain and tears and mourning. I realized on Easter sunday that Laura and Tony are in a better place and they were celebrating our Risen Lord in person!! This gave me chills to think they could go up to Jesus and see his scars and know He sacrificed so they could live eternally!! WOW!

So all this to say...the past few weeks my prayer and my desire is for more of Jesus!

Friday, April 3, 2009

The sun will come out tomorrow...

This has been one of the biggest weeks in a long time. Big is the only way I can describe it I guess. I have had some really cool things happen...and had to do one of the hardest things I've ever done.

Let's start with the cool stuff :) I had this realization this week about how we as humans want to be believed in...need it really! I have struggled off and on in life with confidence. In certain situations I am confident and sure of myself. In others, I want to crawl in a hole. Have you ever noticied in a situation where you don't feel confident if someone BELIEVES in you it makes you suddenly able to do it? I know for myself, the words of someone who is instilling hope and confidence in me is HUGE...One example of someone who does that well in my life is our children's pastor. When I agreed to move to the 2's ministry the words she spoke about me to others instilled confidence in me. Not confidence in my own ability...but what the Lord could do through me if I was a willing vessel. I have had some really cool things happen in my heart through her and through this ministry.

I also had a divine appointment this week. That's another story that is still unfolding but the Lord clearly put this person in my path at the exact moment I needed it. I am still smiling that the Lord loves me so much He does these things...little things...but important to my growth and confidence.

The hard thing is too tender and private to share here but I will say the Lord works in ways we don't understand. He uses us in ways we would NEVER want to be used but I can see on this side of the week a little of why He wanted me to do what I had to do. I don't believe in coincidences...I do believe in honesty and truth...I do believe there is a battle going on around us that we are not always aware of but it is very real. I am confident that "his mercies are new every morning". I wish I could take away pain from those I love...even though I am unable...I know the ONE who is able!